likethebeer

You can tell me, I'm a doctor.

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Actually, this seems to have had unintented consequences: I was hoping people would tell _their_ deepest secrets, not ask me to tell mine.

Actually, the biggest one was when I was 12 and I figured out that my mom was pregnant when my parents got married. It was a big revelation to me at the time, but the biggest thing about it was that I decided not to tell my 2 older sisters. Esp. the oldest b/c she was starting to fight w/our mother and I (a) didn't want to give her ammunition and (b) I didn't want her to feel bad.

Other than that, the secrets I can think of off hand, personally, have to do w/people sleeping together--either me, or knowing about someone else.

The 2 friends: My friend DDD found out that her dad was not her dad when her biological father died when she was in high school. DDD looks so much like her mom, and had fair skin, blond hair and blue eyes, while her sister looks so much like her dad--dark skin, dark eyes, dark, bushy hair. DDD went to the funeral of this man she'd never met--his other daughters had fair skin, blond hair, blue eyes.

My friend SB's dad was married before he married his mom, and didn't tell his mother until the day there were supposed to get married. Because the annulment didn't go through. Ansd she was pregnant. But SB didn't know that until he was about 19, b/c his parents lied about their wedding day.

ANd the co-worker was raised by her grandmother, who she thought was her mother, and her "sister" was her mother; she was the bastard child of a man old enough to be her grandather, who was a circuit court judge in their town. She's actually gotten in touch w/her relatives in the last few years. They're all in their 60s-80s, and nobody cares anymore. Still, quite a mind-blow when you're 28.

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em-porium.livejournal.com

Wow...those are some good ones. I haven't had any big revelations like that in my life. I have had a few friends who have gotten shocks like that though...

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Finding out your mom was pregnant when your parents got married is, in retrospect, not that big of a deal. They never hid it from us, they just never told us to do the math.

the 2 sisters, though--that threw me for a loop. Well, i didn't find out at the same time, and I didn't have to keep it a secret. I knew a few people in college who were freaked by the coming out process, so I kept a few secrets at that time, but by the time I was 18, someone's homosexuality was no big deal to me.

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Your friends all sound like a bunch of bastards.

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Oh, well I never thought of it that way. I suppose SB and my sister were not b/c his mom and my mom were eventually made honest women.

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We had a snotty neighbour who had a big anniversary party for herself.. her 25th. Unfortunately in her zeal she was celenbrating her real 25th, not the 25th she'd been lying about all these years. Anyway, it was funny because her naive kids finally did the math in their heads, out loud while drinking at the party and then started crying and screaming.
I guess I've never understood why this is a problem, but this was quite a scandal for this family. Then again, I'm not a catlick.

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That's the thing, though. If you're Catholic, you know a few people whose parents were knocked up when they got married.

I think the changing of the wedding date for the kids is kind of fucked up, but if a 12-yo could handle that information w/out freaking out, I would hope some kids in their 20s could. I didn't freak out, but I remember being kind of stunned. It had just never occurred to me taht they didn't get married solely due to their overwhelming love for each other. The hardest part was keeping the secret away from my sisters.

I got the revenge, though, when Erin, the oldest, came running into my room about 2 years later to freak _me_ out and tell me the truth, and I just calmly said, "Yeah, I know. What took you so long?" That strategy TOTALLY paid off in seeing the look on Erin's face.

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HAHAHA! BLAM!

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that's got to be the shining moment of me besting her. It's rare that the naive younger sister can screw w/the oldest.

Shit, I didn't even know Erin was trying for a kid when she told me she was 4 months pregnant--that totally floored me.

And, damn, I'm the one who, while getting onto a subway car when I was 17, had my middle sister Maureen say, "You know Erin's gay, right?"

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HAHAHAHA!

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I have a truckload of those moments from Maureen.

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There is your book.

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I tried to write a story about it--didn't work so far. It doesn't translate too well. Damn! She's not majorly bi-polar, only functionally so.

My sister is nationally known by her nom de... living, Moe. People I don't know, know Moe, in most of the major cities around the country. She's like a legend. "Yay! You live w/her when you're 6!" [I do love her an' all that.]

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I don't know Moe, how can this be?

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You're not in the KNOW!

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Impossible. Maybe she's an has been.

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You realize that you're the common denominator in all of these cases...

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bastards love me.

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You are SUCH. A. TEASE.

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You're nosey.

Something's aren't meant to be revealed. Believe me.

But really, what earthshattering secrets do I know? Well, I know that CJ used to have sex in that little back office in the middle of the day during the off-season. There. How's that! ;>

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But NOT because he was having sex with me. We never had sex. Thank the almighty.

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Yeah, who didn't have sex in that closet. And I know with whom, too. Funny story about that...

Of course I'm nosey - it's how I keep my edge. I've found, over time, that there is something about me - and maybe it's that I don't keep many of my own secrets, maybe I'm just really good at getting people to talk - that causes people to tell me things they probably shouldn't. Which in the lj universe is nothing special, cuz this is a totally confessional environment with some bizarre collective delusion of anonymity.

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godamn, I'd never have sex in that nasty cold place, 2 feet from the toilet w/all the bad furniture.

now, see, I've gotten people to tell secrets b/c I don't tell theirs. It all goes back to that learning about my parents when I was 12, i suppose.

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The only secrets I tell are my own.

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