babies, religion
Jan. 31st, 2005 10:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
likethebeerJust a warning here, people.
Well, I stopped by my friends N&M's. Their baby was born 4 weeks ago today. I actually got to see him upright, and he has a personality in his face! Lying down, he looks typically "baby." Archetypal, almost. But, on seeing him upright, I got a sense of his face more. And he's got a little personal face going on. I remember when I got that sense from Z for the first time. Maybe this will be one of those things where I still can't figure out who the kid looks like. Sometimes, they just look like themselves.
They're psyched b/c he's able to somewhat push up or out in certain positions, and he's holding his head up for short periods of time. He's a cutey. For the first time today I got all baby mushy in front of him. Previously I've been either in "awe" mood, or "I'm soooo happy for you, please tell me how the breastfeeding's going" mode, but not that "Oh! Look at you! Oh! I see you looking at me! Oh! How fricking cute are you!!" mode. Yeah, that was going on a little. I've not held him yet, but they hven't offered, and I'm always cigarettey smelling, so I don't ask.
They seem to be fairing ok. I was telling mda and wi_c that I think they feel adrift from outside company. Or that's my my manifestation of feelings of guilt. When their baby was born, we wanted to give them time to hang out and become a family. I told N that we weren't contacting them solely b/c we figured they'd contact us when they were ready. I saw the baby about 2 weeks ago, but not since then. Then on Friday, I think it was, I wrote to them promising to come by and see them the next day. Didn't happen (I ended up going into work). Then I wrote them that night and said maybe the next day. Nope. So I stopped by today. I don't want them to think I'm thinking they're "different" now b/c they're parents. It's just the timing of things.
On the "religious" side, I went to the fus on Sunday (Unitarians). I wanted to in part b/c it's becoming a habit, but also b/c the main minister was going to explain his thoughts about god. Good thing, b/c he freaks me out. The 1st service I saw him give, he said "amen." I'm sorry, it's completely prejudice of me, but amen is one of those flinch moments. Like incense. A part of me thinks "CHURCH!!!" and wants to leap out of the nearest window. And he chooses hymns that I don't agree with.
yes, I said hymns. I was totally freaked out about the idea of hymns when I first talked to someone about unitarianism. Totally made me want to drop the whole frickin' project. But there are at least 2 congregations around here that sing them, and they've got their own song book, so it must be like, a regular thing. The first time I went to a service I just eyed the hymnal most of the time. But when I look at the songs, and I'm ok w/what they say, I'll sing. And there have been times that I've been really moved by the words. This week I didn't sing 1 of the hymns b/c I didn't like the words. Fuck, it takes a lot for me to even contemplate this, and I'm not going to compromise just to save face.
Well, the minister was talking about different popular interpretations of god, the "stern father" being one, and tied that in to the tsunami. Some religious leaders in the Indian Ocean area, Pxian & Muslim, had said outright that the tsunamis were a statement of disapproval from god. So that's what got schuler talking. I was actually pretty happy w/what he said. He's a lot more questioning of the notion than he comes off as sometimes. Not that he's anything like any Pxian leader you could think of, but he's more than I'm ready for. Talk about the Buddha and an Indian sage all you want, but if you quote from the New Testament, even as it's surrounded by other religious doctrine, I get freaked. Writing it, it seems silly that I would get freaked, b/c Unitarianism accepts that inspiration can come from any source. That includes the bible. But all I can hear is strict doctrine, I suppose. And I'll be damned happy to question and drag my feet the whole time. That's kind of what Unitarianism is about.
I'm still not comfortable, and I'm happy that next week there will be 1 of the other ministers. I've thought about other places, and even told mda yesterday that maybe I'm ready to check out the Quakers, but there are still many things that I've liked so far about going to the services.
Similar to our ceremonies in Madison, there are always moments when there's something genuinely funny and everyone laughs. Now that I think of it, there were probably those moments in the churches I went to while growing up, but I don't remember them as much. Also, the place seems to be really accepting. The "greeting" every service, where you shake hands w/the people beside you, seems much more open then I remember it being in the Roman Catholic church (altho that could be due to my attitude). The hymns are usually pretty cool. The music played (aside from the choir) can be v.good (they get musicians from around the area). I appreciate the choir's work, but nothing they've done so far has inspired me as much as the visiting musicians. Half of all the $$ offerings go to different local causes ('cept for 2 weeks, they had 1/2 going to tsunami aid). There are meditations, and moments in every service where I've thought about how to take some of this intention of thought into my life, throughout the week. I haven't done it one whit so far, but I figure it'll wear into me at some point.
Actually, 2 Sundays ago, the same minister, Schuler, was talking about anger. And he had some interesting things to say (he practicses T'ai Chi and meditation, and he brought that in). But I couldn't figure otu why he brought it out now. Then, on Thursday, January 20th, it occurred to me why he was talking about anger. And it helped. Pretty strange.
Well, I stopped by my friends N&M's. Their baby was born 4 weeks ago today. I actually got to see him upright, and he has a personality in his face! Lying down, he looks typically "baby." Archetypal, almost. But, on seeing him upright, I got a sense of his face more. And he's got a little personal face going on. I remember when I got that sense from Z for the first time. Maybe this will be one of those things where I still can't figure out who the kid looks like. Sometimes, they just look like themselves.
They're psyched b/c he's able to somewhat push up or out in certain positions, and he's holding his head up for short periods of time. He's a cutey. For the first time today I got all baby mushy in front of him. Previously I've been either in "awe" mood, or "I'm soooo happy for you, please tell me how the breastfeeding's going" mode, but not that "Oh! Look at you! Oh! I see you looking at me! Oh! How fricking cute are you!!" mode. Yeah, that was going on a little. I've not held him yet, but they hven't offered, and I'm always cigarettey smelling, so I don't ask.
They seem to be fairing ok. I was telling mda and wi_c that I think they feel adrift from outside company. Or that's my my manifestation of feelings of guilt. When their baby was born, we wanted to give them time to hang out and become a family. I told N that we weren't contacting them solely b/c we figured they'd contact us when they were ready. I saw the baby about 2 weeks ago, but not since then. Then on Friday, I think it was, I wrote to them promising to come by and see them the next day. Didn't happen (I ended up going into work). Then I wrote them that night and said maybe the next day. Nope. So I stopped by today. I don't want them to think I'm thinking they're "different" now b/c they're parents. It's just the timing of things.
On the "religious" side, I went to the fus on Sunday (Unitarians). I wanted to in part b/c it's becoming a habit, but also b/c the main minister was going to explain his thoughts about god. Good thing, b/c he freaks me out. The 1st service I saw him give, he said "amen." I'm sorry, it's completely prejudice of me, but amen is one of those flinch moments. Like incense. A part of me thinks "CHURCH!!!" and wants to leap out of the nearest window. And he chooses hymns that I don't agree with.
yes, I said hymns. I was totally freaked out about the idea of hymns when I first talked to someone about unitarianism. Totally made me want to drop the whole frickin' project. But there are at least 2 congregations around here that sing them, and they've got their own song book, so it must be like, a regular thing. The first time I went to a service I just eyed the hymnal most of the time. But when I look at the songs, and I'm ok w/what they say, I'll sing. And there have been times that I've been really moved by the words. This week I didn't sing 1 of the hymns b/c I didn't like the words. Fuck, it takes a lot for me to even contemplate this, and I'm not going to compromise just to save face.
Well, the minister was talking about different popular interpretations of god, the "stern father" being one, and tied that in to the tsunami. Some religious leaders in the Indian Ocean area, Pxian & Muslim, had said outright that the tsunamis were a statement of disapproval from god. So that's what got schuler talking. I was actually pretty happy w/what he said. He's a lot more questioning of the notion than he comes off as sometimes. Not that he's anything like any Pxian leader you could think of, but he's more than I'm ready for. Talk about the Buddha and an Indian sage all you want, but if you quote from the New Testament, even as it's surrounded by other religious doctrine, I get freaked. Writing it, it seems silly that I would get freaked, b/c Unitarianism accepts that inspiration can come from any source. That includes the bible. But all I can hear is strict doctrine, I suppose. And I'll be damned happy to question and drag my feet the whole time. That's kind of what Unitarianism is about.
I'm still not comfortable, and I'm happy that next week there will be 1 of the other ministers. I've thought about other places, and even told mda yesterday that maybe I'm ready to check out the Quakers, but there are still many things that I've liked so far about going to the services.
Similar to our ceremonies in Madison, there are always moments when there's something genuinely funny and everyone laughs. Now that I think of it, there were probably those moments in the churches I went to while growing up, but I don't remember them as much. Also, the place seems to be really accepting. The "greeting" every service, where you shake hands w/the people beside you, seems much more open then I remember it being in the Roman Catholic church (altho that could be due to my attitude). The hymns are usually pretty cool. The music played (aside from the choir) can be v.good (they get musicians from around the area). I appreciate the choir's work, but nothing they've done so far has inspired me as much as the visiting musicians. Half of all the $$ offerings go to different local causes ('cept for 2 weeks, they had 1/2 going to tsunami aid). There are meditations, and moments in every service where I've thought about how to take some of this intention of thought into my life, throughout the week. I haven't done it one whit so far, but I figure it'll wear into me at some point.
Actually, 2 Sundays ago, the same minister, Schuler, was talking about anger. And he had some interesting things to say (he practicses T'ai Chi and meditation, and he brought that in). But I couldn't figure otu why he brought it out now. Then, on Thursday, January 20th, it occurred to me why he was talking about anger. And it helped. Pretty strange.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 08:53 pm (UTC)Forgive me if I get weird here. I had to put a lot of liquor in my hot chocolate to feel like I was getting caught up to
You should ask to hold that baby. It's not going to kill it if you're a little smoky.
It's good that they're contributing to local causes. One of the big reasons for church (at least in the rural areas I'm from) is to build that sense of community. We all live here, we're here to help each other, the handshaky greeting falls in with that too.
I don't know what I'm saying, so I'd better stop. Anyway, hi!
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 09:07 pm (UTC)I'll work up asking to hold the baby. I love wi_c's approach, which was saying, "Baby?" then handing Z to a person. I think he liked the look of confusion on my face as much as anything.
fus. heh. Yes, part of the uu (that's what they call themselves--"Unitarian Universalists") thing is community activism. And they give to causes I believe in. The past 2 weeks it has been a local abortion rights organization--more on the grass roots end of it, rather than the organizational end of it. Abortion rights is not something you hear of often in a church service.
no subject
Date: 2005-02-02 06:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-02-02 01:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 09:05 pm (UTC)My first experience with the UU's was in Gainesville, FL, and it was fabulous. It was everything I am, and everything I think that a gathering of intelligent minds who want to discuss the diversity of religions and their impact on the world should be. They were socially active, had people who disagreed with each other, but all got along and there was forward motion to boot.
Then we moved to Wisconsin. I just figured that all UU fellowships were the same. I was so wrong. We found ourselves at FVUUF (http://www.focol.org/fvuuf/aboutus.htm). Rev. Roger Bertschausen and his family lived right around the corner from us as it turned out and were lovely people, but the fellowship was just like the one you described and so much like CHURCH that I was turned off and never got comfortable.
Worse yet? I felt guilty about not going on Sundays. That wasn't supposed to enter into my UU experience! I hope that doesn't happen to you. Maybe it's a Midwestern UU thing. I'm not certain, but I will say that I have finally realized that a religious home is about the people within it, not the religion itself. Sometimes, all you need is you and the trees to feel good.
:)
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 09:14 pm (UTC)I'm guessing that you have tried the UUA website (http://www.uua.org/)? You can put in your zip and it shows the congregations within certain distances to you, so you could check out something further away. I wrote about my first experience back in November (http://www.livejournal.com/users/likethebeer/162358.html).
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 09:30 pm (UTC)I had a funny reaction to the one in the Lehigh Valley. I tend to be very empathetic, and many of the people there were wounded. I had a hard time not crying during the service, especially during the "concerns and joys." I've never been surrounded by so much raw emotion and it made it difficult to go back. Since then, I've avoided going to any other fellowships and generally spend my time contemplating with nature as my altar.
I have used the locator, though, and may try again at a later date. :)
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 09:47 pm (UTC)Of course, having lived in WI, you realize that "28 miles" is nothing out here. Shoot, Madison is 40 miles away, and 45 minutes to get to, but out in NJ, that can be 2 hours.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 10:00 pm (UTC)New Brunswick is about an hour and fifteen minutes from here, I think. I'm in Belvidere, about 15 minutes from Phillipsburg, NJ/Easton, PA. :)
It's time to friend you- I didn't realize I hadn't yet and I meant to. Is that okay?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-31 10:07 pm (UTC)btw
Date: 2005-01-31 09:54 pm (UTC)I should warn you: sometimes I talk about Frank Lloyd Wright. A lot. And about Taliesin. A lot more. And sometimes I rant about politics. Or baby issues. I rarely filter this stuff, although I usually give warning in the subject line about the politics.
Re: btw
Date: 2005-01-31 10:02 pm (UTC)I should warn YOU- I sometimes post several times a day, I rarely filter, I don't mind hearing about FLW, I love the Arts & Crafts movement, so we'll have some crossover there, I rant about politics and whatever annoys me on any given day, and I tend to annoy people because my life looks better than it actually is. That, I think, is due to the fact that I love it despite its flaws.
In other words, I suspect we'll get along well, especially because your icon was enough to make me happy.
Re: btw
Date: 2005-01-31 10:09 pm (UTC)Re: btw
Date: 2005-01-31 10:17 pm (UTC)