(no subject)
Jun. 2nd, 2004 08:34 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
likethebeerWell, now that Xavier's been born (and so has Tom G's daughter).... I just found out yesterday that my friend MD, who none of you know (outside of real life friends), is pregnant, and it's killing me not to talk about it. Well, they have to wait almost 2 weeks for the next exam, and they think they'll tell people after that. This is her first pregnancy, they're both older, so there's a lot of fear.
I had an almost embarrassing reaction to the news, now that I think about it. I almost cried I was so happy, and I sort of intook my breath and said, "oh. OH." But this woman and I have talked a lot over the last 3 years about our feelings for wanting children. She and her partner have been trying, I think, for 5 years. I guess about a year & a half ago, they both went through tests and things, and it was discovered that he might have some medical condition.
It would cost $8,000 to operate, not covered by insurance b/c it's more or less elective surgery.
And it would only have a 30% success rate. If that was the problem, which they weren't sure of, anyway.
So, they were both freaked out. She more than he, I think. Since that time, she's struggled with acceptance that she might never have a child (and he doesn't want to adopt). And I think she's actually done pretty well. She did confess that she didn't know how she would feel about it when she reached 40, but....
And now she's pregnant. It's unreal. I'm so happy for them, just so unbelieveably happy. I think part of it is that I know what it feels like to hear that little voice inside sometimes say, "you will never have children," and, yeah, they're snotty and loud and screamy and then they grow up and leave you old, broken, and broke, but, they're children. Having them is built into our DNA. And I know what the biological clock is all about. And for them to get what they want after trying so hard. It's just great. I think, also, that I see myself in her and for her to get this is like a part of myself getting it. I'm not saying that I think like this is my child. Of course, I know that this is not my child. But to just know a person who you care about who wants something so much, something you know, that your hopes are linked, no matter how fragilly, to theirs. I had great hopes for them. I just wanted them to get what they've been trying for.
Well, I got that off my chest. Maybe I'll write an e-mail to a friend of mine on the East Coast so I can tell someone else who doesn't know them. No, really, I think I should just keep this private.
I had an almost embarrassing reaction to the news, now that I think about it. I almost cried I was so happy, and I sort of intook my breath and said, "oh. OH." But this woman and I have talked a lot over the last 3 years about our feelings for wanting children. She and her partner have been trying, I think, for 5 years. I guess about a year & a half ago, they both went through tests and things, and it was discovered that he might have some medical condition.
It would cost $8,000 to operate, not covered by insurance b/c it's more or less elective surgery.
And it would only have a 30% success rate. If that was the problem, which they weren't sure of, anyway.
So, they were both freaked out. She more than he, I think. Since that time, she's struggled with acceptance that she might never have a child (and he doesn't want to adopt). And I think she's actually done pretty well. She did confess that she didn't know how she would feel about it when she reached 40, but....
And now she's pregnant. It's unreal. I'm so happy for them, just so unbelieveably happy. I think part of it is that I know what it feels like to hear that little voice inside sometimes say, "you will never have children," and, yeah, they're snotty and loud and screamy and then they grow up and leave you old, broken, and broke, but, they're children. Having them is built into our DNA. And I know what the biological clock is all about. And for them to get what they want after trying so hard. It's just great. I think, also, that I see myself in her and for her to get this is like a part of myself getting it. I'm not saying that I think like this is my child. Of course, I know that this is not my child. But to just know a person who you care about who wants something so much, something you know, that your hopes are linked, no matter how fragilly, to theirs. I had great hopes for them. I just wanted them to get what they've been trying for.
Well, I got that off my chest. Maybe I'll write an e-mail to a friend of mine on the East Coast so I can tell someone else who doesn't know them. No, really, I think I should just keep this private.
Re: you dog!
Date: 2004-06-11 08:02 pm (UTC)