24 Signs You Went to Catholic School

[likethebeer]

http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjkiebus/signs-you-went-to-catholic-school-6ygq

#7: "You've never been hit by a ruler, but you're still wary of nuns." True.

Although #5 didn't happen to me, "You have had to dress as an angel at some point in your life," I did play one of the women who weeps while Jesus is carrying his cross during a Stations of the Cross play when I was in the 8th grade.

.... I wonder if there's a pithy way to put into a photo + caption on what effect not having to worry about what you're going to wear that day (except for clean socks & blouses) does to your sense of "style".

Comments

[immemor.livejournal.com]

13. Our sex education class was canceled as punishment. Seems someone decided to ask, “Why doesn’t the Pillsbury Doughboy have a penis?” in the anonymous question box. Troublemaker.

21. True. I see nothing wrong with Mr. Rogers.

22. True. We have a psychological need to give meaning to our suffering.

24. No. I only still talk to the gay one. The rest all joined the Tea Party.

Sense of style: I refuse to touch polyester.

PS: Is that you in the icon?

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

13 - Father Beech, in our Senior Religion class, taught us about birth control while explaining how artificial birth control was bad. While he was played up effectiveness rates for natural birth control; & used the lowest effectiveness rates for artificial birth control, I realized years later that he was honest on how all of these things worked. I think he came to the realization that he could teach us about all of this stuff, all in the guise of talking about how bad it all was.

21 - I don't see what's bad about Mr. Rogers in that gif, so I guess it works.

22 - there's no question we went through something special. I remember some class in September, when I was a freshman, and I could just tell which kid had gone to public school before this. I remember feeling really bad for that kid because he had no idea what he had just walked into.

24 - I have no memory of kindergarten friends. Then we moved to another state when I was in the 4th grade.

Yes, that's me. I think I'm 4.

[immemor.livejournal.com]

More education than I received. Good thing my parents were hip enough to spill the beans.

The Catholics sent me packing in 9th grade. And thus began my string of being kick out of everywhere.

I was best man at my kindergarten friend’s wedding. I just happened to be the only guy at the courthouse and she said, “Rob, stand next to this guy I’m going to marry and sign this form.” But we’ve lost touch since then.

Too cute!

They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

It was the marijuana they found in her locker. She went to a really good public school after that, never graduated from college, followed the Dead around, and now works as a photographer for NBC in San Francisco. She's the most successful out of all of us.

I had 11 out of 12 years. More Catholic school education than either of my sisters. And we didn't have plaid: we wore polyester jumpers that would have melted onto our skin had they been set on fire (we found that out when we tried to burn a uniform right after graduation).

I'm sure your friend has some sadness that she's no longer in touch; at least just a "aww - how is he?"

Thanks.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[immemor.livejournal.com]

Ha – isn’t that always how it goes down.

I was in Catholic schools from 3rd grade until halfway through 9th grade. Hated every minute of it.

Well, we were never that close. But were in touch from Kindergarten until we were 24 or so.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

My oldest sister is a great example of "trouble as a child, totally successful as an adult." I think it's because, when she sees something, she just goes for it. I forgot - she didn't just follow the Dead; she started a tie-dye business. She made more $ per year by the time she was 24 than I did by the time I was 30.

It sounds like a good thing that your parents took you out of Catholic school. At least you didn't have to endure it from 1-9th grade. Then again, if you had, maybe you would have been successfully inculcated & not hated it so much....

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[immemor.livejournal.com]

I wanted to follow the Dead when I was younger. But I put it off to be “responsible.” Like that paid off. I would do it now, but living in a van and following Pearl Jam at 43 doesn’t sound as romantic.

You know how they say people are naturally gay or naturally straight? I think I’m naturally atheist. I feel like I was born this way.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

I saw the Dead a bit, but it never occurred to me to follow them. And I was living on the East Coast, where going to see them cost a lot of money. And I didn't have the wherwithall to make sell things in order to follow them.

Oh, yes: being an atheist would have made required religion classes in Catholic school an extra-special waste of time. I'm agnostic.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[immemor.livejournal.com]

I saw the Dead once. We were in the Loge. Remember that day in physics class when they taught you about how smoke rises? All that secondhand marijuana smoke drifted up and right to our box. My friend was too high to drive home at first. We had to wait it out in the parking lot.

I entertained myself by making jokes about it in my head. They were teaching religion; I was learning satire.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

I tried, but never got, a contact high. Then realized after several years that I didn't like this stuff. Although I bought other things (which were also a part of my youth) at Dead shows. Things that didn't have fumes associated with them (oh: and weren't addictive or deadly).

I've been to 9 shows, which for Dead heads is nothing. It was fun - you could dance like crazy and nobody thought a thing.

As for religion, I was a total believer. Slowly started to move away when I was a Jr. or Sr. In part because I began to learn about what I call "the other history of the Catholic church." The stuff we didn't learn in religion classes: the Popes & Bishops with mistresses & illegitimate children, the selling of indulgences for centuries.... I was offended that a church that instilled in me a desire for truth would lie to me so blatantly. I only realized I was no longer Christian in my early 20s.

If you've got any jokes that read well, go ahead.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[immemor.livejournal.com]

Thinking about it, he may not have been high. He was a pilot and never did any illegal substances. He may have just been nauseous and didn’t know the difference. Zima and secondhand smoke – yeah, we knew how to party.

Was it anything like that time I tried to mail a letter using a Bevis and Butthead stamp and, next thing I knew, the room was full of pretty colors? Hmmmm, never did get that letter mailed.

I only saw the Dead once. But I’ve managed to see almost every one I wanted to see - except Nirvana and Radiohead.

This is embarrassing, but I’ll tell you anyway. When I was 25, I lived in a house with a bunch of other guys and they were talking about Martin Luther and the Protestant Reformation and I had no idea what they were talking about. Seems Catholic schools skipped that chapter when I took world history.

I don’t really have “a priest, a monkey and Charles Darwin walk into a bar” kind of jokes. It’s more abstract ideas that I (because I’m warped) find funny. Like, if Jesus was perfect, why did he need to be circumcised? Or, the teaching of Noah’s Ark to kids (because kids like animals) creates the hysterical oxymoron: a story of genocide for children. I’m writing (and yet another) novel and some of these ideas are working their way into it.

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

Oh - they covered the Reformation after 9th grade. "The church sold some indulgences, and it was bad, then Martin Luther came up, the Catholic church reformed itself, and it's all been good since then." I remember learning about it because "The Diet of Worms" made us all laugh.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diet_of_worms

I had no idea that 1968 was a year of huge social upheaval in Europe until I was in grad school. It was germane to what we were talking about & fortunately, my professor learned that I had no idea & talked about it in class. I think it was after I told him that learning European history in school ended with "The good war".

Re: They sent my sister packing at that age, too

[immemor.livejournal.com]

Yeah, missed all that. Good thing, too. I would have received (and yet another) detention for laughing when I heard diet of worms.

1968 and 1969 were fascinating years. Never boring those years.

Diet of Worms

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

Our teacher said we would laugh.

[sirreal13.livejournal.com]

No. 20 - I always make room for the Holy Spirit between me and my dance partner... Or my lover. As a result, I'm celibate. God would be proud... IF she had gotten the memo.

My granddad attended Catholic school in Conejos, CO in the 1900s and 19-teens. There was no alternative. He ended up Mormon.

room for the Holy Spirit

[likethebeer.livejournal.com]

Oh, I remember that; they didn't make a point of it in school dances, so I may have read it in Do Black Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up?.

Goodness - I would have stayed Catholic in that case. At least you can get drunk.